We are living in extraordinary times. Events and guidelines for how to live our lives amid a public health crisis are changing rapidly. By following CDC guidelines for social distancing, we can help reduce the speed of the outbreak, but in doing so we may feel a greater sense of disconnectedness.
Our Community Listens wants to offer that it is possible to practice physical distancing yet remain socially connected to those who matter to us. It just may take a different form than we are used to.
Join host Adam J. Salgat as he speaks with Executive Director, Rebecca Buell Emerson and Leader Curriculum Improvement and Development, Sarah Weisbarth. The three of them discuss how the organization is putting online courses into action, increasing their website content and explain the #CareandConnectionChallenge.
They also take the time to check in with each other and share their feelings on this period of isolation.
This podcast was recorded on March 17, 2020.
AI-generated dictation of the podcast audio
Please note that this transcription was completed using AI software. Occasionally, unanticipated grammatical, syntax, homophones, and other interpretive errors are inadvertently transcribed by the software. Please excuse any errors that have escaped final proofreading.
Adam Salgat:
Hello and welcome to the, Our Community Listens podcast. My name is Adam Salgat, and with me today is Rebecca Buell-Emerson, executive director of Our Community Listens. And Sarah Weisbarth, leader of curriculum improvement and development. Hello ladies, thank you and welcome to the podcast.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Hi, thanks for having us, Adam.
Sarah Weisbarth:
Always a pleasure.
Adam Salgat:
So today is March 17th, and one week ago, hosting this podcast and the topics we’re going to talk about and all the changes, is something I honestly didn’t think was going to happen. The first thing for me that really stood out is, I’m a very big sports fan and because of the COVID-19 pandemic, all of the four major sports, including college sports and everything, shut down. In an effort to flatten the curve and reduce the amount of sick in our country.
Since then, schools have closed, movie theaters, fitness centers, all in an effort to reduce the amount of sick that’s happening. Many have been asked to start working from home, and lots and lots of changes have happened.
So ladies, before we get into everything, Our Community Listens is doing to help create care and connection, I want to do a personal check-in. I think it’s pretty important this time that we do a small quick check-in with each other, just to see how everybody’s doing in this kind of new landscape for the next couple of weeks, and potentially more. So, Rebecca, how are you, how are your boys, and how’s everything going in St. Louis?
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Thank you, Adam. St. Louis, we had our first case of COVID-19, actually, as soon as Sarah left. She was here for training a couple of weeks ago. The day after she left, it was announced that we had our first case and I was concerned about all the 40 people that were in town for training that week. So that was a shock, and there was some accidental exposure in our community that sent some ripples and shock waves through conversations and coffee shops, and whatnot. So that’s kind of the community thing.
A week ago, I was having lunch with someone from the convention and visitors bureau, and we were talking about the infection and the things we were going to have to implement, as something that was kind of far off.
Adam Salgat:
Yeah.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
We weren’t assuming it was going to be, a week later, us sitting here in a very, very different situation. So that is a community aspect of it. Personally, as I’ve mentioned before, I’m the mom of two college boys. And one of my sons, my oldest son Gabe, was on spring break in California and he got the message that his college is going to extend spring break. After spring break, the entire campus, a private liberal arts institution up in Chicago, was going online and he would need to clean out his room and come home immediately. So that was kind of shaking as a mom. You know, all of this is going on, it’s progressing so quickly. I have a team to care for at work, and I want to do what’s best for our participants, the people in our communities.
And in the back of my mind, like a lot of other people, there’s this dialogue going on of, I hope my son doesn’t get stuck in California. When will the travel ban come? And is he going to be able to get home? Is it smart for him to go to Chicago and clean out his room? Or should we just leave his stuff in the dorm until May? Because, what’s the exposure rate in Chicago? And so I think, like everyone else, there have been these simultaneous dialogues going on. In addition, we’re getting the home ready for two college age men. One of them is six one, one of them is six, four. I can’t just put them in bunk beds. You know? Having these two college men and having space for them to learn and thrive and grow, when we’re all going to be there together in a two bedroom apartment in the city. So we’ll just see about that.
Adam Salgat:
Well, I wish you luck and I’m glad that your boy made it home safe and that everything is coming together.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Thank you so much. He’ll actually, he’s flying back from California on Friday. He and his dad will clean out his dorm room, and his girlfriend’s dorm room, Friday and Saturday. And then he’ll be here Saturday. So it will be nice to have him home. I think this is an unexpected blessing. I didn’t know I was going to get to have another time in my life where I’d have both my young men, like adult type sons, in my home for a couple months. And so this will be kind of a neat launching pad before he goes off into adulthood.
Adam Salgat:
That is one of the silver linings, and something that I’d like to touch on a little bit later in the podcast as we continue on. Sarah, why don’t you give us a little check-in? How are you feeling? How is everything at your compound?
Sarah Weisbarth:
Oh, at the compound. Thank you, Adam. If you guys follow me on Facebook at all, we joke. We live in a rural area outside of town and we have a really close relationship with our neighbors on both sides. So probably about three to four acres worth is what we now call our compound. I say, if I really think about how I’m doing, I’m really trying to, I feel some emotion rolling up as I talk about this. I am really trying to resist the sense of like hunkering down, and just putting my head in the sand and being like the compound will be fine. We’ll take care of ourselves. I think that’s probably a normal reaction when I think about my family, and what’s closest to me, and what’s most important. I feel like I’m going to gather all of that around me and I’m just going to make sure that it’s all taken of.
And this care and connection challenge has me really reflecting a little bit more about, how am I taking care of those closest to me? And then, what’s the next level? What I realized this morning is that first I have to take care of me.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Yeah.
Sarah Weisbarth:
And I realized with all of the moving parts, and all of the social media, and all of the news, and what are we going to do with our investments? And should we refinance the house? No, we shouldn’t refinance the house right now, that’s crazy talk. In all of this, where is that moment of just like, kind of finding some still presence and connecting in with myself? Because I’m so task-oriented. I can make sure we have what we need. I can make sure Aaron’s got his homeschooling set up, and I can make sure my husband’s doing his thing.
But at the end of the day, how am I present in all of that? And that’s been more my response lately of this recognition of, it’s so easy for me to spin out of control in my thoughts and my reactions that I forget to ground. And that was my new commitment this morning. Thanks to Rebecca’s care and connection challenge, I recognized I’m not really sure I’m adequately capable of connecting right now, if I don’t connect with myself.
So I went for a walk today. It is beautiful here today. Sky is blue and the sun is shining, and we were deep into meetings and calls and I took the opportunity to just pause and walk away. And go for a walk run with my son and the dog, and wave at the other people on the trail. Like, I see you.
Adam Salgat:
Keep your social distance.
Sarah Weisbarth:
And it was really interesting. There were more people on this trail up at a rural community center that were nearby, than we have ever seen before. It’s normally just the two of us out there. And it was really intriguing to watch people be like, truly just wave and be like, I see you and I’m shouting good afternoon to you, but I’m not coming close. But there was almost still a desire to feel like you’re connecting to people. Complete strangers with their dog. It was a really different feeling being on the trail today than normal. It was interesting. Thanks for asking and listening to my ramble, and my self analysis.
Adam Salgat:
Well, I’m glad it sounds like you’re taking the time to keep yourself mentally healthy, and understand that in order for you to help others you’re going to need to keep yourself in that good, healthy state to get there. Let’s talk a little bit about what our.
Sarah Weisbarth:
Hold on. Hold on, Adam. How are you?
Adam Salgat:
I am well. I’m home. I work from home often, so it’s one of those things that is a bit of a change to think that I’m not going to leave to go do a video shoot, or to go to the community center where I work also. And it’s strange knowing that that’s not really an option, so that’s awkward. But I am happy to be home with my girls, and I’m happy to be home with my wife. And there’s plenty of worry inside of me. And I think I need to do a little more of the self-check to help take care of how I’m feeling about things.
But for the most part, we’re doing well. Everybody seems healthy. Everybody’s taking care of themselves. We built a fort this morning with the chairs and the blankets. And last night we did a treasure hunt. And my wife and I sat down after the girls went in the bed and tried to talk without the TV, and without anything for a little bit. Just to change it up and to have the opportunity to connect in that way. Because most of the time after the kids go to bed, she’s a teacher, and it’s directly into working on IEPs and working on lots of things that teachers can’t get to during the day. So between the two of us, we stay pretty busy when it comes to work. But we’re trying to find the silver linings in this and just take it a day by day. That’s the best thing to do right now. But it’s not the easiest. And Rebecca, go ahead.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
It’s not. I just really admire, and I think that’s important. I want to point that out, just that self dialogue and that self-awareness of, this is where I’m at and this is my normal, this is my new normal. And I just want to acknowledge that’s not easy, and it’s different and we’ll figure it out. And I think even having that level of self-awareness is so valuable for all of us in that time. Just to stop and recognize, oh, okay, there’s that emotion. And I’m cool with that and we’ll let that roll, and now we’ll keep going.
Adam Salgat:
Yep. Yeah. And it’s not easy all the time, but that’s the next step. We have watched Frozen Two a couple of times, I will say.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Thank you Disney.
Adam Salgat:
And I know it sounds silly, but there’s a part where, when you don’t know what to do, because you’re saddened or alone, you do the next right thing. I’m not trying to pull wisdom from too many Disney movies or anything, but it’s a really solid message to just do the next right thing.
That is a very good transition into what is the next right thing for Our Community Listens, Rebecca? What have you guys been able to put in place with the new regulations coming? And reducing people meeting in person. What kinds of things is Our Community Listens doing? Moving forward?
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
I lived in the South for a while, so I’ve got all these little Southern idioms in me. Sometimes when life gives you lemons, you just make lemonade. Or you add tequila and make a margarita, whichever way you go. Whatever you need to do.
We have been talking, I come from higher education, that’s my background. My career before I came to Our Community Listens. And we had been talking and dreaming for about the last 18 months, how could we, and is it even possible for us to take the wonderful, beautiful, highly connected and powerful classes that we offer, and how can we make them available to audiences at a distance?
Maybe someone’s not able to join us in person. How could we show up for them in that way? But when you are running and running and running as an organization, and it’s growing and flourishing, it’s hard to stop and kind of pause and put everything on hold. So this has actually given us the opportunity we had not looked for to do that. So what we’re doing is we have paused and postponed all in-person activities, like most things in the country.
If the NBA shut down, then we can shut down too for a little bit. But we’re not shutting down. What we’re doing is we’re just pausing, postponing, those in-person activities and we’re taking the chance as a team to say, okay, how can we serve these communities? How can we care? How can we reach out, and create opportunities for connection? We’ve got this dynamic learning team, Sarah is part of it. And we have this background in curriculum development, in online learning. We have wonderful platforms. We have not had the time to take all those things and reformat our content for being offered at a distance, or offered online. So that’s one thing we’re doing right now. I’m so excited about that because what if we could have a class that included some of our family and friends from Greece and Singapore and Idaho? Or other places where we don’t have programs yet? That’s one thing we’re doing.
The other thing, you mentioned it earlier. We’ve created a hashtag because that’s what you do in the 2020. We created a hashtag the care and connection challenge, hashtag care and connection challenge. And we’re just challenging people to identify moments of care and connection in this time of isolation. This time of social distancing.
This time where it’s easy for us to focus on the markets, or focus on the health epidemic, or focus on the fact that we can’t buy all the things in the store that we might want. What if we focus on the good stuff, and how can we start highlighting that, and bringing us together as humanity? Because we’re all in this together. Sarah sent me, Sunday night, this beautiful, just visionary email of how we can take the tools we currently have and offer them to the world. And I want to share that, just the platform with Sarah for a minute. Sarah, share your vision of how OCL can reach out, and our plan in the next several weeks to create connection and community.
Sarah Weisbarth:
Thanks, Rebecca. As I was reflecting over the weekend of first there’s just the logistical organizational response. Like what the heck are we going to do? And then I was really reflecting on the vision that we have. That we imagine a society where people care about each other first. And I really just keyed up on that word care. Realizing that we’re not going to be able to create that personal connection. So much of what we do, spins off of that three-day class, where we have that personal connection with people. Those relationships are formed. We have that understanding, and we inspire people to go out and create that connection with others in their lives. Well, if we don’t have that, then what do we have? And so just spinning into this concept of caring. How do we care?
Just like you said, we’re seeing so much stress, and what we could qualify as negative emotion on the platforms out there. And how can we just spin it more towards connection? So really going off of that, leveraging the resources we already have. You’re listening to this podcast. You guys have been listening to this podcast for a while. We hear stories from alumni about how this podcast inspires them. We’ve asked in the past for alumni engagement. We’ve had some alumni on.
But this isn’t a medium that we can use to reach out to people. So utilizing this conversation, sharing our content on our podcasts, as it relates here and now. How are we responding to change? And what does that look like when you look at our content? How are we reacting to people around us? I see DISC tendencies just on fire around me all the time right now, because we’re all stressed and our layer of choice is compressed. So engaging with our podcast more.
Utilizing our blog. People want to share. People want to share what’s going on with them. People want to connect through writing. And we’re going to increase the use of our blog. And we’re going to continue to ask for those alumni engagements with our blog, and ask people to share their thoughts around how is this content impacting them, especially in this time of change, and share those out on our blog. We’re increasing our webinar opportunities. Actually, as we’re recording, I’m seeing all of these emails fly in right now about, okay, I’ve got this one scheduled, and this one planned, and I’m posting this on our website. I’ll post it to the Facebook. Our team at Our Community Listens has come together, rapid fire, to get a lot of this accomplished. So we’re increasing our webinar opportunity for people to connect with us.
And those are just almost like the more concrete items that we’re able to start to leverage. But going more into the sense of connecting, utilizing our social media for good. Sharing those videos. I know I’m working up to sharing my video about what I just reflected to the both of you at the beginning of our recording today, about what does it really mean to connect with myself in this time period. And I want to share that with others because I have some idea that it might matter to somebody. And just invite others to share what they’re doing in the realm of care and connection, and how their stories, their real life, like let’s get real people. Like homeschooling all of a sudden has totally changed my perspective on the homeschool life.
Adam, I appreciate Becky being a teacher because let me tell ya, I can’t make lesson plans for a 15 year old. I don’t know what that looks like. And for just having the opportunity to share and be real with people, and connect through those electronic mediums. So I just really encourage people. We’re going to have a link where you can submit your video of your care and connection challenge, and we’ll share those out on our social media.
And then this opportunity for listening sessions. We just talked about it this morning. We don’t know exactly what it’s going to look like in a formal way, but we know people need to connect. We know that people need someone to listen to them. Just like the three of us did for those moments before we started into the information. Maybe the meat of our podcast today, but maybe not the most important part. Maybe the most important part is the three of us just seeing each other’s faces and talking and chatting so we don’t feel so isolated. I think when we think about what’s the next right thing, I think that’s the message our organization has to share, is that we don’t have to be so isolated. And we’ve been saying that for so long, and we have a great opportunity to do it in a different way now.
Adam Salgat:
Sarah, thanks so much for sharing a lot of the opportunities that are coming from Our Community Listens in the following weeks in a virtual medium. I did see there’s one that’s going to be focused around marriage. And in about 10 to 14 days, there may be a number of couples that would need a little boost in that space. Because I’m not going to lie, I could be one of them.
It’s such a different change that we are all going through. We joke sometimes that we see our coworkers more than we actually see our family, and this is now the complete flip of that. So it’s going to be different, and I think it could be really great.
When speaking about care and connection, as I mentioned at the top of the podcast, I’m a big sports fan. And one that I want to mention very quickly is there’s a NBA rookie, the first choice in the NBA draft last year, a 19 year old Zion Williamson who plays for New Orleans Pelicans, said that he’s going to donate 30 days worth of salaries of the part-time staff that work at the hometown arena. And when I saw that, and I read his whole message which continued on about his mama basically taught him, you got to take care of people. I thought, that is such a unique spot that young man is in at 19 years old, and look at what he’s doing. So it made me think, what can I do, and how can I get involved? And that’s what we’re asking people to share. And I know Rebecca, you’ve seen a few things, a few stories out there that I know you’d like to share.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Thank you, Adam. Yeah, I think national tragedies, it gives us an opportunity to come together as people, and really bring out the best in us. You know, there’s moments that we’ve all had a fear, or anxiety, or even self-centeredness, if we’re really honest. But I think it also gives us the opportunity to come together with the very best of ourselves. And I’m seeing that, I’m looking for that, in the news and social media, and the lives around me. And it can be big and huge and grandiose, like Mark Cuban, owner of the Dallas Mavericks. He is looking for ways that he can set up a system to pay the people who sell nachos and sell hot dogs and tickets and clean the stadium where the Mavericks play. They’re hourly workers who are not getting paid.
There’s also an association of like bar owners. National, it’s this big national association, that if you are a bartender or cocktail waitress, and you’re not able to work because public places are shut down, you can apply to this place for financial assistance. But it doesn’t have to be big and grandiose like that.
I see the best coming out in individuals. There’s been these stories that I just can’t help but want to call the person and know the person. Where people will go to nursing homes and stand outside nursing homes and look through the window and talk on the cell phone to the person they love on the inside, because they don’t want them to feel alone.
You know, nursing homes right now have been shut off to visitors because we know the elderly are at highest risk of infection, and critical infection. So that moment of human connection, other people with whiteboards like standing outside. Remember that movie from the 80’s, Say Anything? Where the guy stands with the boombox above his head. That’s what I’m envisioning with white boards and writing notes and showing them through the windows.
Like, you’re not alone. We see you. We love you. We’re having chicken for dinner. Just those everyday life messages to help people stay connected. I love that. I think the best of humanity is coming out. Places like McAlister’s deli and other local delis, lunch places, making sure lunches are available for students that are in schools that are shut down. In St. Louis, we have several school districts that are 100% free and reduced lunch. Which means there are thousands of kids in our metropolitan area, within our 27 school districts, that depend on the school for breakfast and lunch every day. So delis and pizza places are stepping up to make sure every child has opportunity to get a sandwich, or get a quesadilla, or get something to eat. We’re seeing the best show up. I also, I got to admit, and I know we’re going to air this not today, it’s going to be a few days out. So the world may change by then. I’m sure it will.
So I’m kind of cautious to admit that I actually went out to lunch yesterday, but I did. I went to a restaurant for lunch and the owner came around to every table and thanked us for being there. And he was so personable. The owner, the head chef, came around and just the graciousness and the lack of judgment that I get to see, and I’m choosing to see. When I asked the waitress if I could have a Clorox wipe for my hands, there was no judgment. It just grace. Right?
And I was in the line at Chick-fil-A, I don’t really cook, that’s coming out in the podcast. I was in the line at Chick-fil-A this morning for breakfast. And I asked the young lady who took my order, I said, are people being good to you? And she said, you know what? So many people have given me Purell. Like little hand sanitizer bottles of Purell, just at the drive-through. Like here, I want you to have this. I think we have the opportunity to be the very best of ourselves. So that’s one thing with the care and connection challenge, let’s highlight those things. We see so many things in the news that are scary and awful and bad. Let’s suspend judgment. We don’t know where the person’s at when they are stockpiling beans, or they’re stockpiling toilet paper. We don’t know what their trauma response is in that, or where they’re going. But what we do know is we all have the opportunity to take what we have, whatever the best of ourselves is, and offer that to someone.
That could be your presence, it can be listening. It can be a phone call to your grandparent you don’t talk to very often, but you know that they’re quarantined or they’re self isolating for their own health stake. Taking those opportunities to reach out and connect as humans, to really care, to spend quality time together, to make someone see, to make someone feel seen, heard, valued. To make them feel like they matter. That’s the opportunity we have. And again, it doesn’t matter if you’re Bob Chapman or Mark Cuban, or you’re Sarah Weisbarth waving to someone on the trail. We have the opportunity to connect and make people remember that they matter.
Adam Salgat:
Rebecca, thank you so much for those amazing stories. And I agree, it is all about that human connection and that’s what Our Community Listens has been talking about. And that is the goal, is it not?
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Absolutely. Absolutely.
(music).
Adam Salgat:
Sarah and Rebecca, thank you both so much for being on today’s podcast. As we wrap things up, Sarah, tell me a little bit about your key takeaways from today’s podcast, and what is from Our Community Listens.
Sarah Weisbarth:
I think it’s just real important for me, for our listeners, to know that although we’re probably not the first place you’re going to turn to for information on COVID-19, you’re probably not going to come to us for homeschooling lesson plans, or how to work from home successfully with your partner and family, is that we are here to help you connect. And that we’re here to help you realize and continue to understand that you have the knowledge and skill within you to continue to connect with those in your span of care. Those people that are there to support you as we look at, how is this impacting our community? Because our community cares.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
We do indeed. I want to caution our listeners and invite our listeners. There is this weird one way pseudo connectedness that we have in social media. We put things out there because we’re hoping for some kind of threads, or crumbs, of connection in humanity. And quite often they go out in this filtered made up polished way, and subsequently, because of the Instagram, Facebook, Twitter generation, we’re emotionally relationally, socially more disconnected than we’ve ever been in history. So I want to challenge and invite listeners, everyone that has taken one of our classes, those who have been thinking about taking one of our classes, and to those of you who this is an entirely new organization and you haven’t heard of us before. I want to invite you to take those opportunities to connect authentically, and step away from the screen. And right now we’re on a screen looking at each other, recording this podcast, but look for other opportunities.
Even if you can’t leave your home, even if you can’t get out and do all the social things you did before. I’m going to encourage people to look for those opportunities, whether a phone call or a Zoom call. Or talking to someone on the balcony, across the street. To be authentic and to be real, and connect with other people. Because that is an important thing that we have that sense of community in care and we don’t feel isolated. We feel seen, heard, and valued.
And the other thing is, let’s remember that we all have something valuable to give. So that might be texting someone that you know is having a hard day, and letting them know that they’re not alone. Or calling that person, or being the person who stands outside the nursing home. Or being the person who waves from at least six feet away on the trail at the park. We all have something to give. We’re not all going to be Bob Chapman. We’re all not going to be Mark Cuban. But I can be Rebecca Buell-Emerson. And you can be Sarah, and you can be Adam. And that’s a really cool thing to be. So let’s share that,
Adam Salgat:
Rebecca, thank you so much for that reminder because I think it’s vitally important that we move forward with that kind of mindset. Thank you. And thank you both for taking the time to chat today.
Rebecca Buell-Emerson:
Thanks Adam for having us.
Sarah Weisbarth:
Yeah, thank you.
Adam Salgat:
If you have any suggestions about subjects for our podcast, feel free to reach out through our Facebook page. And if you’re interested in taking a class, visit ourcommunitylistens.org. Thank you again for listening to our podcast and don’t forget, each word, each action, each silent moment of listening, sends a message. Therefore, you are the message.
(music).
